Wednesday, November 16, 2005

THE BEAUTY OF PLAIN SPEAKING

“But above all things, my brethren, swear not, neither by heaven, neither by the earth, neither by any other oath: but let your yea be yea; and your nay, nay; lest ye fall into condemnation.”

(James 5:12)

QUOTATION FOR THE DAY

“The notion of political correctness declares certain topics, certain expressions, even certain gestures, off-limits. What began as a crusade for civility has soured into a cause of conflict and even censorship.”

(George Bush, Sr.)

BRUNSWICK TOWN COUNCIL SEEKS LEGAL ADVICE OVER PROPOSED MONUMENT TO FIREFIGHTERS

A proposed monument to firefighters in Brunswick may become the latest casualty in the culture wars. A 54 square foot granite monument was to be erected at the new fire substation at Cook’s Corner, but one town councilor in Maine’s most liberal town suggested that the words on the monument might not pass the political correctness test. The town council then decided to obtain a legal opinion before allowing the monument to be built. It was thought that the monument might be objectionable to some because it is inscribed with the words of the Fireman’s Prayer, which begins “Whenever I am called to duty, God…”

The controversy over the words on the proposed monument is part of a nation-wide battle over the use of religious language on public buildings, and comes during the same week as atheist Michael Newdow filed a lawsuit with the 9th Circuit Court to prohibit the use of the motto “In God We Trust.” The councilman who suggested the legal review of the proposed monument is Robert Galloupe, who is also a member of the Executive Board of the Maine AFL-CIO.

The Fireman’s Prayer is printed below. The same prayer is inscribed on a monument in Augusta dedicated to the fallen firefighters of our state, and on a monument at the National Firefighter’s Academy. The Brunswick town council will take up the issue again next Monday, November 21st. 

A Fireman's Prayer

When I am called to duty, God,
Whenever flames may rage;
Give me strength to save some life,
Whatever be its age.

Help me embrace a little child
Before it is too late
Or save an older person
From the horror of that fate.

Enable me to be alert
And hear the weakest shout,
And quickly and efficiently
To put the fire out.

I want to fill my calling
And to give the best in me
To guard my every neighbor
And protect his property.

And if, when I have done my best
And am called to Thee,
Please bless with your protecting hand
My friends and family.

LOCAL ACTIVIST TO OBSERVE THANKSGIVING WITH “DAY OF MOURNING”

A noted Maine activist has announced his intention to spend Thanksgiving by observing a “Day of Mourning.”  In previous years Larry Dansinger, head of the ROSC (Resources for Organizing Social Change) had traveled to Plymouth, Massachusetts to attend the “National Day of Mourning” held there since 1995. This year he has decided to make it a local event at the Peace and Justice Center on Park Street in Bangor. Dansinger is asking all those who are troubled by the “mythical” aspects of the Thanksgiving holiday to join him in an alternative observation, which will feature songs, ceremonies, a speech to those assembled at the Peace and Justice Center – “and preferably no food.”

ANOTHER EMPLOYEE FIRED FOR ANTI-GAY REMARKS

The story of Matt Barber is conclusive proof of the enormous power of the homosexual rights movement, and is a clear indication of what is in store for the people of Maine. Barber was a successful manager at Allstate Insurance’s Security Division until he wrote an online column critical of the homosexual lifestyle, whereupon he was summarily fired by Allstate for “creating a hostile work environment.” What makes Barber’s case unique is that his comments were not made at the workplace, but at home.  After being fired, Barber found it impossible to secure another job in the insurance industry, and soon thereafter he sued Allstate.

Barber went on to start his own website WebTruth.net. His website provides the interesting bit of information that a company called “Diversity Inc.” rates Allstate as “the ninth most homosexual friendly company in the nation.”  Those wishing to help defray the cost of Matt Barber’s litigation against Allstate can find the contact information on his website.

WRITER POKES FUN AT FENCE-SITTERS

This past weekend, in an article in the Lewiston Sun Journal, a spokesman for the Catholic diocese of Portland attempted to blame Mike Heath of the Christian Civic League and Paul Madore of the Maine Grassroots Coalition for the failure of Question 1.  Following the long tradition of “Holy Fools”, and with careful consideration for all the dignity that this comment deserves, the lay catholic members of the Catholic Humor Guild offer the following parody.

Portland Maine - November 14, 2005

Responding to growing criticism concerning either involvement or lack thereof in the campaigns for and against Question 1, the Roman Catholic Diocese of Portland today issued additional clarification regarding its position neither supporting nor opposing gay rights legislation in Maine.

"While some would see this as a clear defeat for the Catholic position, others can with equal clarity discern a victory", said the diocesan political spokesman.  "It just depends on your perspective.   While in truth we were neither defeated nor victorious, neither can anyone say that we won or lost.  We prefer a positive view; we won and they lost."

When asked to elaborate on who lost, he replied.  "They did.  Those people who actually took a position and campaigned for it.  Had we done the same, we might have lost too.  Then we'd be losers just like them.  How would that feel?" he asked.

"Let's face it.  Our credibility as the prophetic voice of Christ in Augusta depends on the Church maintaining an illusion of invincibility.  Had we risked victory and failed, that credibility would have been damaged and our effectiveness diminished."

"We were not neutral on Question 1.  Had we been neutral, there would have been no possibility that the ballot outcome could be interpreted as victory.  Our position was clear, and it was clearly not neutral.  Neutrality is for cowards and hypocrites.  We were neither.  Neither were we for nor against.  This was our clear position from the beginning and we never wavered.  We could not have been clearer had we
taken a position!"
 
"While we neither won nor lost on Tuesday, we are now well positioned to exploit the outcome and move forward.  So, let us all join together to celebrate victory or at a minimum to revel in the absence of defeat."

Buoyed by the prospects of additional opportunities to avoid defeat, the diocese will soon be articulating positions on other controversial social issues.

Nearly ready for promulgation are positions neither opposing nor supporting same-sex marriage, neither affirming nor negating capital punishment, neither accepting nor rejecting physician-assisted suicide, and neither defending nor attacking abortion while simultaneously neither promoting nor suppressing a woman's right to choose.

"This last position is our greatest source of both pride and shame," he said.  "Two positions on one issue have become routine for us, but the simultaneous holding of four positions on a single issue is truly groundbreaking."

The year ahead is expected to be neither dull nor exciting.

Catholic Humor Guild © 2005